 |
|
:: CATWOMAN ::
:: TREASURED MEMORIES ::
.June 2005.
.July 2005.
.August 2005.
.September 2005.
.October 2005.
.November 2005.
.December 2005.
.January 2006.
.February 2006.
.March 2006.
.April 2006.
.May 2006.
.June 2006.
.....And I just got home.....
Things went well. I did not cry. I was nervous at first especially when he came to find me, sat beside me and told me to go see his mom.
After the necessary introduction (it was just me alone ok!), I kind of hit it off with his mom? Heh. I don't know lah. Then Abang came over and when Ansari and Abang got talking, his mom gestured me to sit beside her.
And so we started talking and talking and laughing. Hahaha. After Ansari had to fall-in, and Cik Yam wanted to catch a glimpse of him for one last time, everywhere she went, she asked me to come along lah.
So cute!
And then we even stood at the glass door where the police had to check their passports. Then Cik Yam told me we should "bye-bye" kat Ansari together.
*cute-ness*
So now Ansari's itching to know whether his mom likes me and if she knows I'm his girlfriend.
I'm not telling you Sayang...
Not telling...
You nak tahu, tanye your mom sendiri!
I'll blog properly in a few days about the sightings of Anneh and Mushadad k? Love you all!!
My biggest fear is...
Not YOU cheating on me for another girl...
Not YOU leaving me because you're not ready for a serious commitment...
Not YOU leaving me because of opposition from my parents...
My biggest fear is...
Of YOU leaving me because YOU THINK YOU aren't good enough for me...
Of YOU leaving me because YOU THINK YOU have failed as a boyfriend...
Of YOU leaving me because YOU THINK YOU have lost all feelings for me...
It's not for YOU to decide whether or not YOU are good for me. The decision lies with me because only I know deep within me whether YOU are worthy of me or not.
It's not for YOU to decide whether or not YOU have failed as a boyfriend because without failure, there is no success. Failures in life only serve to make one into a stronger person.
Remember when YOU asked me if YOU were to propose to me now, would I be willing to be your wife?
From the moment my parents found out about US and I cried so hard fearing that I would lose YOU, fearing that NS would only serve to tear US apart and fearing that YOU would never be a part of my future, from that moment on, I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with YOU.
I didn't say it then because I wanted to keep that sacred feeling deep within me. At least if things do not turn out the way I want to, I only had MYSELF to blame for harbouring hopes. For building castles in the air.
Remember when we were in the train last week and YOU hugged me so tight and said to me that nobody else could take me away from YOU?
Let me assure you that no one will ever take me away from YOU because all I want is YOU. There is no one else in I want to be with except for YOU.
Remember when YOU told me while we were lying down on the breakwaters of Pasir Ris Beach that YOU wish the both of us do not have to return back to our homes so that YOU can have me to YOURSELF?
That day WILL come if WE continue to remain strong.
Remember when YOU told me 2 weeks ago that YOU are afraid YOU aren't able to give me a good life?
It does not matter how much YOU earn, what kind of house WE live in, what kind of car YOU drive, what kind of lives WE lead because as long as YOU are willing to be there with me, every step of the way, likewise I'm willing to stick by YOU through thick and thin.
Remember when YOU told me about 3 months back that YOU wanted US to go our separate ways?
I tried all means and ways to get YOU to think things over not because I was desperate, not because I did not want to go through a break-up but because I did not want YOU to make the biggest mistake of YOUR life and live to regret it.
Remember when I asked YOU if I had agreed to a separation, would YOU have asked me back?
YOU said YOU would because YOU knew it was YOUR mistake.
I admit, I seldom say "I Love YOU" to you. Simply because I feel that no amount of words can express the amount of Love I have for YOU. No amount of words can be put to together to sum up all of my feelings for YOU.
That is why, I prefer to be with YOU, to be beside YOU and SHOW YOU how I feel for YOU.
Anyone can say "I Love YOU" to others. I can say "I Love YOU" to Shah Rukh Khan but does that exactly explain how I feel for him? It's just a term of endearment I have for an idol.
I can say "I LOVE You" to all of The Kukuz but what does that mean? It means I Love them for being the sisters I never had. For accepting me for who I am.
With YOU, it's different, the reason being that YOU give me this unexplained feeling of warmth, joy, smiles, laughter and bliss. Being with YOU just takes me away from all my troubles.
When I'm with YOU, all other things take a backseat. When I'm with YOU, I try to make full use of every minute, every second and every nano-second. I treasure our train rides home even if it's only for 45 minutes because that's the ONLY time I get to communicate with YOU.
To YOU, it might be a waste of time seeing me for less than an hour but to me, it's good quality time spent with YOU.
Never say goodbye when YOU still want to try.
Never give up when YOU still feel YOU can take it.
Never say YOU no longer LOVE a person when YOU can't let go.
Can YOU tell the rain to stop falling?
YOU can't because the clouds exist...
Can YOU tell the birds to stop singing?
YOU can't because it's in their nature to do so...
Can YOU tell the moon to stop shining?
YOU can't because the sun exists to provide it with light...
Can YOU tell the Earth to stop spinning?
YOU can't because if that happens, all life on Earth will be wiped out...
Likewise, don't ever try to stop me from making sacrifices for YOU. For YOU, I'm willing to go the extra mile. For YOU, I'm willing to go against all odds. For YOU, I'm willing to prove to my parents that what WE have now is very special.
Don't ever try to stop me from Loving YOU because I will Love YOU until it kills me. As long as there is time, as long as there is Love, as long as there is YOU, as long as I have a breath to speak YOUR name, I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU.
Who knows what tomorrow may bring. I might not live to see tomorrow so I'm trying to seize every opportunity I can to be with YOU. However, since YOU do not feel likewise, I hope this entry is able to explain to you why I've been doing what I did.
Please note that while YOU are gone, there is someone here who is waiting for YOU. Someone who will forever be counting down the days till YOU touch down in Singapore safely. Someone who has pledged herself to stay so true and so loyal to YOU because YOU are irreplaceable in her heart.
And that SOMEONE is ME...
"LOVE is a short word, easy to spell, difficult to define, impossible to live without. Love doesn't make the world go around, it's what makes the ride worthwhile. YOU can look all over for Love but YOU won't be able to find it. YOU can't see Love, YOU must feel it. LOVE is afterall only a word, until YOU meet someone who gives it a meaning. Someone who shows YOU what Love is..."
And for me, that SOMEONE is YOU...
This time all I want is you
There is no one else
Who can take your place
This time you burn me with your eyes
You see past all the lies
You take it all away
I've seen it all
It was never enough
It keeps leaving me needing you
Take me away
Take me away
I've got nothing left to say
Just take me away
I try to make my way to you
But still I feel so lost
I don't know what else I can do
Cause I've seen it all
It was never enough
It keeps leaving me needing you
Take me away
Take me away
I've got nothing left to say
Just take me away
Don't give up on me yet
Don't forget who I am
I know I'm not there yet
But don't let
Me stay here alone
I've seen it all and it's never enough
It keeps leaving me needing you
I've seen enough and it's never enough
It keeps leaving me needing you
Take me away
Take me away
I've got nothing left to say
Just take me away
Take me away
Take me away
Just moments ago, Abang said this to me:
"Noreen, I'd do anything for you. Actually I'm too lazy to send R*** off but I knew you would want to send Ansari off so I made plans to send R*** off too, even before you smsed me yesterday. So do come with me, k? Just convince your parents. You'll be in safe hands..."
"Abang, stop being so nice to me. You're not helping things. You're making me cry..."
"Noreen, don't cry. I'm willing to help you this Saturday. I know you really want to send Ansari off..."
"And if I cry over there? Can I cry on your shoulders?"
"Cry on my shoulders boleh lah tapi jangan sampai hingus meleleh..."
"No guarantees..."
"Noreen... R*** is going to be there too you know..."
(silence from me)
"Noreen......."
"I know. I know. Then while you talk to R*** where do you expect me to hang around? With Ansari's parents?!!??"
"Hang around Ansari's neck lah!"
"NOT FUNNY"
"Does Ansari's parents know about you?"
"Well they have seen me..... Other than that, they don't know anything. Well I hope not..."
"Don't worry. Things will be fine. Come with me, k?"
"Let me think about it carefully first, k?
"Think??!!! What's there to think of??!! You will regret it if you don't go!"
"Ok! Ok! I'll ask my parents later..."
"Oh, anyway, the pretty girls who are sending their bfs off also need a shoulder to cry on what... So after their bfs board the plane, you have to share my shoulder with them..."
"HA.HA.HA. SHUT UP!"
"Kawan" maner yang sanggup send off her "friend" at the airport for a 430am flight??!!
Saturday is impending and I'm seriously not looking forward to it. Thinking about it is making me lose sleep. This time on Saturday, I'll be crying my eyes out.
Take me away...
Just take me away, Ansari...
Nazurah...
Then BOTH of us got obsessed with the shades...
YES I wore those kiddy shades! Vogue kan??
WE WORE OUR SHADES UPSIDE DOWN!!
Ummm I was trying to snap a shot of her lashes...
I love Love LOVE this pic!
Dah penat bergambar jadi minom susu!
Nadiah and Nabilah
After that, I had to tutor at Tampines. So imagine la. From Toh Guan to Tampines. Then Ansari smsed to tell me that he was outside and he wanted to watch a movie so although I was tired, I just agreed to meet him. Then in the end after I rushed from my tuition place to the interchange, he didn't want to watch a movie but instead wanted to look around for his shoes and pants.
We walked around Tampines and he saw a nice pair of pants from U2. Then he said he should get a pair of shoes first before deciding on which pants to buy. So in the end we made our way all the way to Peninsula Plaza. Walked and walked and we saw quite a few shoes. Very nice ones. Within his budget.
And then in the end, he decided he should get a pair if pants first and then come back to Peninsula the next day, wearing those pair of pants and then get shoes that go with the pants.
You see... He needs to wear pants and shoes to Taiwan. Sheesh. Jeans tak boleh keee??
Thus, we made our way back to Tampines without buying his shoes.
While we waited for the train...
So we went back into U2 and I had to pick the size and colour for him tau. So he tried on 2 pairs. Grey and brown. So after 30 minutes (yes we spent a good half an hour in U2 just for him to try on 2 pairs of pants), he finally settled on the brown pants.
Boleh berposing lagiiikk!!
Luckily the fitting room was not crowded, so we could afford to stand around and talk things out. Seriously tau... Ansari is so hard to please. Kalau gitu jangan tanye my opinion lah!
U better hurry and decide on which pair of pants to buy if not I snap a picture of your banana!
Actually I didn't mind following him around one bit. I love it when people ask for my opinion. I do make a good shopping partner you know. I'm a very patient person. So Sayang... Luckily I ni penyabar kan?? It also helps that I have a good taste kan??
So after we got his pants, Ansari asked me to accompany him to Peninsula the next day which is today. Hahaha. Then he said:
"Az, u pakai brown k besok? Kiter jadi brown couple..."
"Alaaaah. Then I have to pakai t-shirt baru I... Baru nak save it for next wk..."
"Takpe ah. Then I get to see ur new tee..."
My new brown tee...
Hurhurhur
So he smsed me at 9 am telling me to meet him at Tampines MRT Control Station at 11 am. I reached there punctually at 11 am despite having to rush and clean up the house and had to wash my hair, iron my tee and skirt, put on make-up, decide on which pair of pumps to wear and which bag to bring.
And Ansari? He arrived 20 minutes later!! Kalah pompuan tau dekni siap. Then we made our way to Peninsula Plaza.
He settled for the brown Gola shoes that I chose!!
I think the shoes are nice la. Very old school. Kinda skater-ish but not exactly skater-ish. Hahaha. It cost him a freaking $139 but it was one of those limited edition pairs you know and according to Ansari it was well within his budget. UK Size 10. Kaki punye lah besaaarrr!!
And we all know what they say about men with big feet!!
Then he made his payment and then we entered this shop selling sex toys. I suggested it because I thought it would be safe to enter that kind of shop with my boyfriend. Of course Ansari made sure I really wanted to do it before we entered the shop.
Sooo we walked in, looked at the stuff together. The board games. Foreplay games. The toys. The edible undies. The condoms. The penis extension. The vibrator. The booby pillow.
I left the shop feeling uncomfortable. Not due to the fact that Ansari was there beside me scrutinizing every single toy that caught our eyes and me questioning him incessantly about the toys although 3/4 of the time he didn't know what the toys were for! I felt uncomfortable because firstly the toys were so fucking expensive. One toy cost $128!! and secondly, I seriously wondered why people bother to buy those sex toys. Issshh.
However, Ansari did enlighten me about certain stuff. Nothing offensive, nothing explicitly sexual. It was really enlightening though. Heee.
After that we made our way to Esprit at Raffles City Shopping Centre. I tried on 1 white tank top and 1 yellow spaghetti top. This is where I hereby agree with Shaikhah and Azura that Ansari can be such a cheekopek at times because when I opened the door of the fitting room, he was standing smack in front.
Then he insisted that I went back in and tried on the white tank top and yellow spaghetti top again and let him see me in them. Gaaaawwwwddd. I didn't mind except for the fact that just now i wore a black halter bra with pink straps!! So he saw my bra la. Sheeeesh.
In the end I settled for the white tank top and another orange tank top because the yellow spaghetti was waaaayyy transparent. In his own words...
"Tadi je boleh see things, imagine kalau u tak pakai coli..."
My new Esprit tank tops
After that we sat for a while and then made our way back home as I was really really tired.
Eh I know lah I'm short... Lower the digicam can or not??
Kinda shaky cos I was tip-toeing...
Malas lah nak smile!
I had to tip-toe for every single shot!! So tiring.
Took random shots in the train...
I love these yellow pumps of mine!
Big foot, small foot
When boredeoom strikes...
Ansari knew I was bored in the train so he tried to entertain me. However, boredoom plus exhaustion means that I won't ever pay attention so while he talked, I took random shots. Hurhurhur.
"Az... nanti kat Taiwan I belikan u things k?"
"Oh ok. U tahukan ape I nak?"
"Yesss... Jacket, many-many earrings, rantai, gelang and many-many earrings lagi..."
"Hahaha... Pandai pun..."
"Shoes u nak tak?"
"Eh tak lah. Itu a bit susah. Takot their measurements not the same..."
"Ok... My mom suroh I belikan dia baju kat Taiwan..."
"Oh ok... Tapi I think a bit susah kan nak cari?"
"Tu ah. Takpe. I'll find for her..."
"Hmmm then ur Dad?"
"Dia nak I belikan dia kasot..."
"Kalau size tak same cemane?"
"Takpe I try. Kalau kasot tu very ketat, then my Dad blh pakai..."
"Merepek lah u ni... Oh oh... Belikan Andhika jam..."
"Oh ok... Abih u nak watch tak?"
"An... I dun wear watches..."
"Lawa tu kalau u pakai watch..."
"Tak nak lah... Rimas..."
"Abih baju u nak tak?"
"Ummm blh!! Taaapppiii... U tahu kan I like my tops tight? Jgn beli besar-besar k?"
"I beli yg keeetaaaat skali. Jadi u tak payah pakai coli when u wear the tops..."
"Gaaawwwdddd..."
I'm so bloated right now. Serious. I ate a whole lot of food within the span of an hour and so now only God knows how long it will take for my stomache to process all the food.
Oh dear tummy, please process my dinner quickly. If not, I won't have space for breakfast!
Earlier during the day, I was at Bedok Interchange. Went to NTUC Fairprice, 7-Eleven and then Giant Supermarket to find Ben & Jerry's Ice-Cream. Yup. I suddenly developed a craving for it just before I went to bed last night. Actually it was around 3am that I finally decided to settle in for the night when I suddenly felt like having Ben & Jerry's so I smsed Ansari.
Then this morning Ansari smsed me to tell me to go find Ben & Jerry's at any supermarket. I did find Ben & Jerry's but they were only available in the big tubs. No small ones leh. Only big ones leh. If I buy, then how to finish leh? Ansari don't eat a lot leh. Cannot leh.
So in the end, while waiting for Ansari to make his way to Bedok Interchange, I made my way to the library. Then a guy stopped me to ask for directions to the library and seeing that I was going there also, I decided to walk with him.
Then we started talking. Him asking me where I'm studying now. Yadda, yadda, yadda. Then he introduced himself and said he was from Mediacorp. He's in charge of acting classses and stuff and then he gave me his namecard. Hahaha.
I'm not interested in acting you know. Haha. Ok I don't know lah. Just that... Acting????? Meeeee????? Oh sungguh tak boleh. Mampos penonton semua lari. Tak boleh. Kalau suroh tulis skrip tu boleh lah. Itu gerenti saya boleh buat.
So when Ansari finally arrived, we went to buy some new games for him to install into his PC. Command and Conquer lagi lah. Suruh beli Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles tak nak. In that shop also, we bumped into another friend of his. Syed Ali I think.
So like FINALLY we headed back to my place. I was so so very excited to buy all the oily, fried food. You see, since Monday he had promised to go to the pasar malam near my place and buy me whatever I want and eat them with me. So for this whole entire week, I was all jittery because I was excited at the thought of sinking my teeth into all those delicious, yummy and scrumptious fooooood.
It didn't help that before he met me just now, he was actually from Beach Road so he bought me Kebab J Lo. When I smsed him whining away to him that I could not find any small tubs of Ben & Jerry's, he told me not to worry as he had something else for me. Hurhur. So sweet.
So this was what we had for dinner.......
His Nasi Sambal Goreng
Why do guys like to eat rice huh? Can somebody tell me? Pergi pasar malam abih beli nasi sambal goreng. Takde makanan lain keeee??
My Kebab J Lo without the sayur
I think it has been about 2 months since I ate the Kebab J Lo. My all time favourite kebab. Definitely.
We bought 3 Burger Ramly. His was chicken. Mine was chicken and beef. Yes yes. You read that right. There wasn't any typo. I had 2 Burger Ramly. Ayam dengan daging. Then he insisted I took the photos of our burgers in this order...
All closed up...
Seee... Dah bukak...
Ta-daaaa!!
As per normal, he always finishes his food first. Then he took my camera away from me and with the camera fully on and in his hands, he stared at me eating and got ready to take that one precious shot of me eating. Why did I say one precious shot? Because the moment he got his hands on my camera, I stopped eating because I knew he would get up to such nonsense.
Then Firas came to join us, so I got distracted by them talking and started eating all over again and Ansari took a shot of me eating!! Grrrr....
Sungguh tak senonoh!
You see, we had actually planned to collect some stuff from Firas so we sat at the one of the void decks near his house. Ansari said after we were done, he would give Firas a call to collect the stuff from him. So while Ansari was waiting to take a shot of me, Firas called...
"Eh cemane kau tahu aku dekat dgn rumah kau?"
......
"Eh cemane kau tahu aku pakai baju belang-belang?"
......
"Eh kau kat maner ah? Cemane kau tahu sume ni?"
......
So it turned out that... Firas already saw me sitting at the void deck. I think it was because I was in the bright blue tee. Firas was walking home through the park behind. Ansari had his back towards the park. So Firas saw me from far but he thought I was with another guy. Serious! Tak bedek!
When he joined us, he said to us:
"Aku tgk dari jauh pompuan tu mcm aku kenal je. Tgk punye tgk, Azreen lah. Eh kenape dia dgn lelaki lain? Kan Ansari kat dlm camp. Eh tak blh. This can't be right. Takkan dia klua dgn lelaki lain... Jadi aku tros call kau lah An. Abih aku dgr dialtone. Ok maybe kau dah bookout ke. Abih aku diri blakang tembok ah. Aku tgk korang dua. Abih aku nampak kau reaching out for ur hp. Abih bile kau angkat, aku tgk korang dua, abih the guy depan Azreen tgh berbual, slamat lah. Kau rupenye..."
Burger dah habiiiss!!
So we sat at the void deck. Talked and talked for 2 hours I think. Firas sat beside me while Ansari sat in front of us. Firas related to us all sorts of stories and experiences. All were memorable and funny ones. No scary ones. Phew! Firas told Ansari to change S$500 when he goes to Taiwan because he needs to buy stuff for me as well. Hehe. S$500...
Taken while Firas went up to his house to bring down the stuff for Ansari...
Batman and Solid Snake...
I put on one side of Firas's glove...
Then me and Ansari started boxing each other with one hand because each of us only had... well one glove on.
An, kat Taiwan sejuk giler tau. Aku tido sampai pakai ni...
Eh, boleh buat snowcap ah. Firas kau ingat tak time kat SP dulu aku gi skola dgn snowcap? Aku kan Chester Bennington dulu...
Perompak cacat! Can't breathe!
Taleban! Taleban!
Gawd. Now I'm reminded of the time where me, Ansari and Shaikhah were waiting for my turn to be auditioned for the Sungguh Hot thing on 20th August last year and then Shaikhah was interviewing Ansari. So she recorded him on video. She asked:
"So Ansari... Dah besar nak jadi aper?"
"I want to shoot the Taleban..."
The 2 best buddies...
My primary school mate and my boyfriend... Small world indeed!
*cute-ness*
No introduction needed...
I asked him to show teeth and he REALLY did show teeth...
Which picture is the nicer one of the 2 huh?? I think the 1st one right??
Then Firas walked out with us as he wanted to buy something from the pasar malam too. So Ansari was already tired and malas to walk me all the way home that he told Firas to teman me instead. Even despite Firas trying to get him to change his mind, Ansari still refused to put his malas-ness aside.
Takpe lah. My perot pun dah kenyang. I tak kisah lah ade orang hantar balik ke tak. Hurhur.
So Firas and me walked around the pasar malam. I bought 3 candy floss for my students that I will be tutoring tomorrow.
Pink, Blue, Purple
Then Firas bought a glass of coke. Those sold in those classic glass bottles. Then as we were walking, he semangat tau nak bukak botol tu. Pusing punye pusing tapi tak boleh bukak. Pusing lagi. Pusing punye pusing pun tak jalan jugak.
"Alamak Firas... malu lah. U can't open the cap..."
"Eh I know ok. I managed to do it the last time..."
"Ummm... Do u twist the cap? Or lift it up?"
"Twist it..."
"Huhhh? Cemane nak pusing? Kan tajam. Nanti tgn berdarah..."
"Betol. Pusing..."
"No laaah... Try lifting it up..."
"Eh no no. This is not those corkscrew caps..."
"Alaaah gi balik ah suroh nyonya tu bukakkan..."
"No no no. There's no way I'm getting the nyonya to open for me..."
"Ok then. We shall see if u can open it in front of me..."
So in the end, he couldn't open the cap so he had to walk home all thirsty. Bet he asked his dad for help.
Ok lah. Saya dah ngantok. Ngantok giler babi. Ngantok sengantok-ngantok nyeeeee. Mata dah tak boleh angkat. Byeeee!